The Fine Art of Portrait Tattooing

I think that it’s really important to try out new ways of expressing oneself artistically. I feel as though it enriches the soul to endeavour new types of artistic medium to manifest one’s effusion towards life. There are so many options. Whether it’s macramé, interpretive modern dance, joining your local mummenschanz troupe… the possibilities are quite simply ENDLESS. I’ve decided that since I’m very minimally adept at figurative drawing and painting; and exceptionally, deeply, and distinctively bereft talent wise. (especially pertaining to portraiture representations of human beings), I made the completely ridiculous choice that I should try my hand at the beautiful art of Portrait Tattooing. I mean, it only makes sense right?My first thought was which person out of all the people in the world… who’s likeness shall I choose to portray? The second thought was from which group of people would I select to be the person (or persons) to BE my living canvases? In selecting a subject I decided that whomever I selected should be noteworthy. I have seen Portrait Tattoos depicting random ugly babies, unattractive spouses or deceased loved ones…but then I thought; who really cares? Those tattoos are of nobodies. I mean, those kinds of subjects would definitely have had some kind of significance to the people who chose to place them upon themselves..but from the general public’s viewpoint? They have zero meaning. I thought that the concept of having some random celebrity… (whom you have never known or ever even met) …having that celebrity’s image permanently displayed forever on your body would be so much better! So what dead person of infinite beauty, and of course, easily recognisable to everyone should I choose? Why Marilyn Monroe of course! Her iconic image permeates our society even after her death fifty eight years ago. I doubt that there are any people on this planet who are as famous and recognisable. So in choosing my human canvases, I had to select the most incidental, unimportant, casual acquaintances that I could think of. People who would also be the most appreciative recipients of her likeness; wanting her visage being proudly preserved on their bodies forever. So after seconds of intense pondering and deliberation, I chose four middle-aged gay men from middle America whom I had basically no previous connections to. (I used Craig’s List) My criterium?They had to be gullible, easily persuaded (and drunk). I think that you will agree with me that my attempts to immortalise Marilyn speak for themselves.

Since there obviously is no way that I could possibly improve upon my skills and abilities with this very ancient and significant art form, I think that I shall move on to bedazzling, and puffy painting sweatshirts. I feel that this above mentioned particular art form is sadly and undeservedly in decline.

Hattie’s Parade

Good-bye Brian. I will miss you. You always respected me and my ideas even at the age of twenty! Loretta B. Demille. Hattie Hathaway. Brian Butterick. You helped make so much possible for me and so many others. They even stopped the traffic on 2nd Avenue for your memorial march. Impressive.

PANSYBEAT T’s If You Please

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I’m just saying…If it were me, I’d buy two. In ten years you could buy five for what you’ll get on ebay.

These T’s will cheer you up. Wear one to Coachella and make new friends. You never know who you might meet in the laundry room. If anyone asks just say, “I don’t know, what’s Pansybeat with you, handsome?” Works everytime.

Yours truly,

Yours Truly.

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A New Chelsea Gallery Is Having a Group Show

Just when you thought all the good galleries had crossed water to make room for Roasteries and even more luxury rental towers, a new Chelsea gallery has sprung up around the corner and is currently showing some nerw art by several artists who I suspect do not live in the area.

Keeping track of gallery hours can be a headache but this gallery has a unique approach to that because they are never open. They are always closed, padlocked in fact. No worries for the art lover though because all the art is easily viewed from the sidewalk right in front! A clever idea and a little perk for the line of commuters who line up daily in front of it, waiting for their bus to…um…actually I have no idea where that bus goes but there seem to be hell of a lot of people taking it everyday to “somewhere.”

Anyhoozle, as they never say in the art world, here are few highlights of the show…

Black/Pink – not the Korean pop group – from GHOST.

GRAFFITTI’S exploding purple bomb.

Werds, werds and more werds. You’ll write a rope of words and strangle this business! – sorry but sometimes ( like all the time ) I need to quote Norma Desmond. Nevermind.
It’s a very well lit and spacious gallery. I’m not sure who did the installation on the floor, but it’s GEEEEEENIUS.

Stop by and check it out of you are in the neighborhood. No address is posted ( on the chain link fence “piece” across the front – which is totally also geeeeenius – but you can find it right around the corner from the new KGB Museum on 14th St and diagonally across the intersection from the new Museum of Illusions and for any old time locals, it’s next door to the check cashing place on 8th an 15th. A note for visiting tourists; The gallery is Google Headquarters adjacent so after your selfie with the sign, turn around and have a look. Enjoy your visit to NEW YORK CITY – The artistless city of art!

#werds

#GHOST

#Graffiti’s

UPDATE: Pop up installation in front of the gallery tonight! Anybody know the artist of this piece?


See Egg, Love Egg

EGG begins playing in theaters this FRIDAY! 1/18

My friend RISA MICKENBERG wrote it, I saw it and it’s great. You should see it too.

EGG is a dark comedy that explores the duplicities of marriage and parenthood: why we revere it, fear it, delegate it, or forgo it.

Starring Christina Hendricks (Mad Men), Alysia Reiner, (Orange Is The New Black), Anna Camp (Pitch Perfect) Gbenga Akinnagbe (The Wire) and David Alan Basche (The Good Wife).
Written by Risa Mickenberg. Directed by Marianna Palka. The film premiered at the Tribeca Film Festival. Distributed by Gravitas Ventures.

Great article in The Washington Post

100% fresh on Rotten Tomatoes

EGG THEATRICAL SCHEDULE
1/18 New York The Roxy Cinema at the Tribeca Hotel #2 6th Avenue NYC Starts 1/18 for 1 week (click to purchase now!)
1/18 Los Angeles at Universal Los Angeles, Universal Cinema AMC at CityWalk Hollywood, 100 Universal City Plaza, Universal City CA 91608 Starts 1/18 for 1 week
(Tickets will be on sale in L.A. and in all below AMC theaters by Wed 1/16 pm)
1/18 San Francisco, AMC Deer Valley 16, 4204 Lone Tree Way, Antioch CA 94531 Starts 1/18 for 1 week
1/18 Denver, AMC Westminster Promenade 24, 10655 Westminster Blvd, Westminster CO 80020 Starts 1/18 for 1 week
1/18 Orlando, Barnstorm Theater, 2733 Brownwood Blvd, The Villages FL 32163 Starts 1/18 for 1 week
1/18 Cleveland, Tower City Cinemas, 230 W Huron Rd #7256, Cleveland OH 44113 Starts 1/18 for 1 week
1/18 Atlanta Southlake Pavilion 7065 Mount Zion Cir Morrow 24 Starts 1/18 for 1 week
1/18 Boston Liberty Tree Mall 20 100 Independence Way Danvers, MA Starts 1/18 1 week
1/25/19 Chicago Emagine Frankfort 19965 South LaGrange Road Frankfort Starts 1/25 for 1 week
1/25 Detroit Emagine Royal Oak 200 N Main Street Royal Oak MI Starts 1/25 for 1 week
1/23 Southbury CT, Riverview Cinemas 1 night
1/18 Houston Alamo Drafthouse Cinema LaCenterra 2707 Commercial Center Blvd Katy TX 1/18 for 1 night
2/13 Lubbock TX Alamo Drafthouse 120 West Loop 289 2/13 1 night